The ego has set up many different kinds of self-concepts and roles to keep us trapped, including identification with family relationships and with the body. The only responsibility we have is for our state of mind, we are not responsible for people, animals, debt, etc. If we give ourselves over to the Holy Spirit and following His guidance, the Spirit will handle all of the needs we seem to have in miraculous ways while we unwind our mind back to God. All things will be used in this unwinding, including family relationships. “The whole purpose of life is to wake up from this dream of this world. The ego would have you believe that you exist in this world and you have to attain and achieve certain things in your lifetime. And all of education and learning is based on learning more, but everything in this world is backward and upside down. When you think you advance in this world you are really falling back. And when you think your life is completely falling apart, you are actually opening your heart. So actually, there are always miracles and there are always blessings. The ego invented linear time, and God only knows eternity. So, past and present and future are part of the trick.”
Family Conflict
Family Life and the Spiritual Journey
Nothing can go wrong when we follow the Spirit’s guidance. When we begin the spiritual journey, we may seem to get negative reflections from our family at first; but they are really just calls for love. Keep extending love in these moments and just trust in the great plan for awakening and in the Holy Spirit. Everything always works out in the end. And remember that all things work together for good, you can’t mess this up!
Mother Concept of the Ego
When someone you are concerned about (such as a daughter) keeps coming to mind, it is a Call for Love to bring to the Holy Spirit. It may or may not call for a specific action (such as calling or emailing the person), but it is always helpful to take it to prayer and look at one’s thoughts. The ego has set up many “ego ideals” such as being a “good-enough mother”, and it’s important to look with honesty at these thoughts and be willing to release them with Spirit’s Help.
ACIM and Raising Children
Every symbol and image that you see with the body’s eyes is a reflection. When you look at a child, you can see the child as a mirror of your mind. Any grievances and limits you see in the child are within your own mind. If you are practicing ACIM and raising children, you see what is taking place in your thoughts. As children go through grade school and into high school, you can look at your own beliefs about authority, normalcy, education and success.
Asking Real Questions
You are not limited by time and space. So, you might be left with the question, “Am I even really here?” It can seem that way. You need a guide. And it is important to ask Him real questions, questions that do not start from the assumption that the ego illusion is real. Loosen your consciousness, ask deeper questions, and you will be freely answered.
Why So Many Rules?
Why does our world have so many rules, boundaries, and laws? When the mind seemed to separate from God, it was a chaotic experience, and so the ego invented rules and boundaries to repress the feeling of chaos from awareness. The ego made up the cosmos and all its limits as a way of trying to limit the feeling of chaos. But the ego is merely a belief in lack; a belief that you are not already whole and complete in God.
Right or Happy?
Would you rather be right or happy? If you are not happy, what do you see as the problem? Money, family, job, health … or is the complex list of issues just a distraction device? As you become aware of where the problem is, you can move towards the solution instead of continuing with the distractions. ACIM daily lessons 79 and 80 direct the mind towards this awareness. Lesson 79 gives you the thought: “Let me recognize the problem so it can be solved.” (W-79) Lesson 80 moves into: “Let me recognize my problems have been solved.” (W-80)
Possession and Ownership
No private ownership. Share everything. Shared bank account. These ideas are scary to the small-self that believes it lives in the world! The ego uses possession to organize images: “My arm, my leg, my phone, my money, my child, my husband, my wife.” The idea of possession and ownership is at the core of the illusive world! Love does not possess. Let go of your possessive ways. Possession is a cult of the mind. The good tidings are: Freely you have received, now freely give. Let go of possession of “your” thoughts and memories.
Who Are You Trying to Convince?
It is helpful to remember that your healing journey is not about convincing others. It is about practicing mind training for yourself in all situations. In many of David Hoffmeister’s ACIM videos, he shares his own story to help people struggling with similar situations. At the beginning of his mind training, he tried to be completely non-compromising. Sometimes things would seem to blow up in his face as he tried to integrate his new outlook into his life. The question that he found helpful to ask himself was: “Who am I trying to convince?” He found that there was no one he needed to convince. He found that everything was an opportunity for mind training.
Self-Concept and People-Pleasing
When your reactions come from a mistaken self-concept, they are like blind reactions. Ultimately, the self-concept has to be questioned. In this video, David Hoffmeister talks about one of the more puzzling “A Course in Miracles” quotes, “Recognize what does not matter, and if your brothers ask you for something ‘outrageous,’ do it because it does not matter.” (T-12.III.4:1) What does Jesus mean by this? Does it mean that if your brother asks you to something outrageous like rob a bank with him, you should say “sure!” and go for it?